"Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish."
John Quincy Adams
I always appreciate a Bible verse or great quote that provides an anchor - resonates in such a way as to push me, recharge my spirit, or create the appropriate spin for my attitude to adjust.
This week, we found out that our initial trip to Haiti may be delayed. At first, we were obviously disheartened by this possibility. We look forward to the minute when we can meet the girls and begin to build the foundation of our family. However, I am purposely using words like "may" and "possibility", hoping for unusual timeliness - a miraculous flow of events that allow for a tighter timeframe.
At the same time, however, we need to practice patience and perseverance. We need to have the flexibility to roll with changes, and the faith to know that each step is occurring in just the right timing. So, instead of traveling in May/June, we may be traveling August/September. Either way, we're traveling. Either way, we'll meet the girls. We'll continue to persevere and watch those obstacles vanish.
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Lifelong Learning
Many of you continue to ask us what the latest news is or how things are going. In the last week, we had some important appointments that went very well, procured some additional notarized documents, and we are working on the final touches for one of the grant applications.
For our continuing preparation, we will be taking part in another adoption training class, similar to one we completed years ago. We are looking forward to refreshing what we learned previously and applying the content to this very different path. Although we've been at this for many years, we always feel the need to learn more. We know that we can't possibly learn enough to ever feel really prepared.
However, every little bit helps. :-) So, here are a few titles we've enjoyed and one that is a current read.
Just a Minute: In the Heart of a Child, One Moment...Can Last ForeverWes Stafford - President and CEO for Compassion International
I was fortunate to hear Mr. Stafford speak recently. He chronicles amazing moments that have impacted children in powerful ways.
Fasten your Sweet Belt: 10 Things You Need to Know About Older Child Adoptions
Jodi Jackson Tucker with Agnes Tucker
This was one of the "right when you need it" books. Jodi shares her family's story in a way that provides true insight and raised our awareness to the unique needs that accompany older child adoption. Her invaluable experiences and openness heightened our level of understanding and opened our minds to the possibilities that may arise.
Currently, I'm reading Wounded Children Healing Homes: How Traumatized Children Impact Adoptive and Foster Families
Jayne E. Schooler, Betsy Keefer Smalley, and Timothy J. Callahan
Part One begins with the following quote:
For our continuing preparation, we will be taking part in another adoption training class, similar to one we completed years ago. We are looking forward to refreshing what we learned previously and applying the content to this very different path. Although we've been at this for many years, we always feel the need to learn more. We know that we can't possibly learn enough to ever feel really prepared.
However, every little bit helps. :-) So, here are a few titles we've enjoyed and one that is a current read.
Just a Minute: In the Heart of a Child, One Moment...Can Last ForeverWes Stafford - President and CEO for Compassion International
I was fortunate to hear Mr. Stafford speak recently. He chronicles amazing moments that have impacted children in powerful ways.
Fasten your Sweet Belt: 10 Things You Need to Know About Older Child Adoptions
Jodi Jackson Tucker with Agnes Tucker
This was one of the "right when you need it" books. Jodi shares her family's story in a way that provides true insight and raised our awareness to the unique needs that accompany older child adoption. Her invaluable experiences and openness heightened our level of understanding and opened our minds to the possibilities that may arise.
Currently, I'm reading Wounded Children Healing Homes: How Traumatized Children Impact Adoptive and Foster Families
Jayne E. Schooler, Betsy Keefer Smalley, and Timothy J. Callahan
Part One begins with the following quote:
Loving and living with a traumatized child means embracing a love like no other. It is love lived out every day in a new and unfamiliar way. It is commitment cemented through the challenges and struggles of uncertainty. It is a life journey walked on unknown paths. It is a faith, a hope, and a vision that the future will hold something far better than what you are experiencing now and perhaps ever dreamed possible.Just a few chapters in, and already this is a foundational read.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
March Madness...of a sort
If you are anything like Wayne, you are reveling in this season of NCAA basketball-palooza. Amidst our paperwork completion, studying expert advice, and signing up for classes, we will also be enjoying the march to the final four.
In addition, we will be enjoying madness of a different sort. Meet Pepper - the newest member of the Bickers/Hockett clan. She will be joining us in just a few weeks. We've all missed Gigi, my parent's beloved puppy, who was with us for 18 years. Dad has wanted another dog for quite some time, and the rest of us didn't need much convincing. A friend of Dad's was kind enough to allow us to choose Pepper as a new member of the family.
As you might imagine, dogs as pets are not prevalent in Haiti. From what we understand, Haiti has watchdogs and dangerous stray dogs - people veer away from dogs.
Our hope is that we can all work together to train Pepper well so the girls will be able to meet her on their own terms. We know how helpful dogs can be to the healing process. We are also hopeful that the girls will become comfortable with Pepper, learn how to interact with pets, and how to react when they are approached by other dogs.
In addition, we will be enjoying madness of a different sort. Meet Pepper - the newest member of the Bickers/Hockett clan. She will be joining us in just a few weeks. We've all missed Gigi, my parent's beloved puppy, who was with us for 18 years. Dad has wanted another dog for quite some time, and the rest of us didn't need much convincing. A friend of Dad's was kind enough to allow us to choose Pepper as a new member of the family.
As you might imagine, dogs as pets are not prevalent in Haiti. From what we understand, Haiti has watchdogs and dangerous stray dogs - people veer away from dogs.
Our hope is that we can all work together to train Pepper well so the girls will be able to meet her on their own terms. We know how helpful dogs can be to the healing process. We are also hopeful that the girls will become comfortable with Pepper, learn how to interact with pets, and how to react when they are approached by other dogs.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Grateful
Grateful -adjective
warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful
While this definition comes close to what we would like to express to each of you, we don't know if there will ever be the words to truly express how much we've been lifted by your overwhelming love, support, and generosity.
Please know that any donations made, via Project Hopeful (the donation button on the blog), are all anonymous. When I asked for a list so I could send thank you notes, they provided insight as to why this wasn't possible. I understand their position completely. So, on behalf of both of us, please consider this post as sincere appreciation for any donations, prayers, or support that you've shown.
We've also included another glimpse of what's inspired us. Steven Curtis Chapman has shared video spots, showcasing Show Hope, at many of his concerts. This was is one of my favorites. While the climb up this "Everest" of international adoption is intensive and financially overwhelming, the reason we climb is the only motivation we need; 3 amazing girls, hope for the future, limitless possibilities.
warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful
While this definition comes close to what we would like to express to each of you, we don't know if there will ever be the words to truly express how much we've been lifted by your overwhelming love, support, and generosity.
Please know that any donations made, via Project Hopeful (the donation button on the blog), are all anonymous. When I asked for a list so I could send thank you notes, they provided insight as to why this wasn't possible. I understand their position completely. So, on behalf of both of us, please consider this post as sincere appreciation for any donations, prayers, or support that you've shown.
We've also included another glimpse of what's inspired us. Steven Curtis Chapman has shared video spots, showcasing Show Hope, at many of his concerts. This was is one of my favorites. While the climb up this "Everest" of international adoption is intensive and financially overwhelming, the reason we climb is the only motivation we need; 3 amazing girls, hope for the future, limitless possibilities.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Miracles Abound
Adoptions require inordinate amounts of paperwork...completed forms, personal histories, birth certificates, marriage certificates, medical, legal, social, you name it. These documents are completed, checked over, notarized, authenticated, legalized, hand-delivered, over-nighted, tracked....
We've been through many rounds of these processes over the past many years. When a Home Study is completed by the social worker, it is submitted to DCFS for approval. This has to occur before other pieces can fall into place. In our experience, as with the experiences of others, this approval can take weeks - even months. So what's the miracle? This time around, our wonderful social worker, Heather, called DCFS directly, told them the story of the girls, and our Home Study was approved in 3 hours...3 hours.
Tomorrow, several of our documents are being hand-delivered to Haiti. First of all, what an amazing blessing that we aren't worried about the tracking for this set of paper. However, before the documents can be taken to Haiti, they have to be legalized at the Haitian Consulate. Initially, our agency was told this would take at least 4 days or more. So, what's the miracle? One of the top folks at the Consulate called Heather last night to let her know they had completed the process in a day and the documents would be ready.
Fortunately, these events seem to occur right on the heels of other events that can be complex and downright challenging. These bright spots in the tunnel of the paper chase keep our spirits high and recharge our hope.
We've been through many rounds of these processes over the past many years. When a Home Study is completed by the social worker, it is submitted to DCFS for approval. This has to occur before other pieces can fall into place. In our experience, as with the experiences of others, this approval can take weeks - even months. So what's the miracle? This time around, our wonderful social worker, Heather, called DCFS directly, told them the story of the girls, and our Home Study was approved in 3 hours...3 hours.
Tomorrow, several of our documents are being hand-delivered to Haiti. First of all, what an amazing blessing that we aren't worried about the tracking for this set of paper. However, before the documents can be taken to Haiti, they have to be legalized at the Haitian Consulate. Initially, our agency was told this would take at least 4 days or more. So, what's the miracle? One of the top folks at the Consulate called Heather last night to let her know they had completed the process in a day and the documents would be ready.
Fortunately, these events seem to occur right on the heels of other events that can be complex and downright challenging. These bright spots in the tunnel of the paper chase keep our spirits high and recharge our hope.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Some Inspiration
Music is central to our lives. We can each point to songs that are embedded in our hearts and souls for a variety of reasons. Steven Curtis Chapman is an artist who's work has impacted me in this way. He is the father of 6 children, 3 adopted from China. His family started a foundation, Show Hope, with the central purpose of supporting orphans through adoption.
His family's open and honest adventure has been a source of inspiration from the beginning of our journey years ago. Two anthems for adoption are below. The lyrics of the second, Meant to Be, resound in my heart for all the kids in the world, especially those who desperately need homes.
When love takes you in from Franchesca Vargas on Vimeo.
Steven Curtis Chapman - "Meant to Be" Music Video from David N. Watson on Vimeo.
His family's open and honest adventure has been a source of inspiration from the beginning of our journey years ago. Two anthems for adoption are below. The lyrics of the second, Meant to Be, resound in my heart for all the kids in the world, especially those who desperately need homes.
When love takes you in from Franchesca Vargas on Vimeo.
Steven Curtis Chapman - "Meant to Be" Music Video from David N. Watson on Vimeo.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
First Post Ever...Whoa
Faith, Hope, Love seems to be our version of Ready, Set, Go…
Faith – believing in what we cannot see – knowing there’s a Master plan
Hope – perseverant desire that we will one day have a family
Love – for each other, for our family and friends, from above…love in spades
As many of you know, we've been traveling down the path of adoption for quite some time. Everything we've experienced over the last 7 years pales in comparison to the adventure we are living right now. We have been relatively private about our past experiences with adoption, but we are committed to openly sharing this amazing ride. Please share this link with anyone you feel would be interested, and subscribe if you'd like. We are honored by your support in any form: prayers, donations, advice, good thoughts.
When we are closer to official government approval, we will certainly
share more information and pictures of these amazing young ladies. At present, it is important for us to guard
their stories as we would guard an invaluable treasure.
Updated as of July 7, 2012: Our current timeline includes a first trip to Haiti later this summer or fall. The girls are currently 14, 9, and 7. When children turn 16, the Haitian government categorizes them as not adoptable. We are obviously doing everything we can to ensure that the adoption can be completed (or at least mostly completed) prior to a 16th birthday.
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